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ForumChat What do you think of me?

What do you think of me?36 Posts

Pseudolonewolf`s Avatar
23yr
United Kingdom
MelancholicPhlegmatic
559F
293 / 8
Rating Orb A β Pseudolonewolf, Neutral Good Almighty God-King – joined 10 years ago ..XXX.XXX8 years ago
This is not the first time I have asked this question to the people at large, but I spend a lot of time deep in introspection, wondering about myself and how others perceive me, since I care a lot about what people think. I am aware that I have many obvious sorts of flaws that make me, uh, not exactly very easy to get along with or, uh, 'accessible' or friendly and such, but hmm...

That recent thread, 'Ban for Insubordination?', brought this topic to mind again because of the various posts... A lot of people thought I'd ban people on a whim just because of mild annoyance, and many also said that they saw that I took great offence to 'minor criticism', whatever 'minor criticism' might mean... which made me think that they perhaps perceived me as some short-fused ticking time bomb who'd explode if you so much as poked it slightly? o_O
Then there was that person who essentially called me an arrogant racist.

Yet there were also people who seemed to understand my bio quite well and defended me, which was rather happifying for me...

It, uh, all made me wonder anyway what people think of me!

I also remember events that came back to mind because of that thread, like an incident in the early days of this site where a large number of members basically hated me and thought I was some kind of evil tyrant... Hmm.

ANYWAY, uh, yes. That question... What do you think of me as a person, people, and what have you seen of me to base that opinion on?
Do you think I'm a good person? A bad person? Do I intimidate people? Would you be dishonest so as not to be banned? o_O

I would hope that if people choose to focus on the negative traits I seem to clearly have, that they might at least understand WHY I am the way that I am, why I act the way I do...
I am the made this site hello hello.
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Jimiliscious`s Avatar
20yr
United States
MelancholicCholeric
97F
14 / 1
Rating Orb Jimiliscious, Lawful Good Programmer – joined 9 years ago 72.23.XXX.XXX8 years ago
First off, you are not racist by any means. America is a country, not a race. But I suppose it is a prejudice, and for us Americans (being USA not the Western Hemisphere), prejudice is a sin. You are just a hateful person. I know it may sound harsh or as an insult, but it seems to be true. You hate many things, most of which are loved by the USA. Creationists, electric guitars, public displays of affection, politics, Christianity, etc. However, you are justified in many of your hates and entitled to your own opinion. I also cannot criticize you for being a hateful person because I believe I have had a happier life up unto this point than most. Not perfect by any means, but clearly I have not endured anything so dramatic throughout my life that I would dramatically change the way I am.

But clearly you have some issues with your past, your family and your social skills, all of which are pretty clear to see. You hated your school years, and just abut everybody in the institutions. You also hated everything about your younger years, including your first Flash creations for some reason. I believe you said something along the lines of "I hated who I was back then, using smileys and the end of my sentences" or something. Also, your problems with women at a younger age also seems to have affected you, as you have said before Your stepfather has caused you a great amount of grief for being different and what not. Clearly your social skills are lacking because of many of the previous causes before and also a cause for your problems in the first place. Had you been in a different situations with different people there to help you you would not be who you are today, for better or for worse. I don't know how you can become more social in the real world (apart from several...."plastic" American shows about completely changing your life), for this seems to be the root of your anger (depression would be a better word...), and your problems as we speak.

You are not a bad person. You seem to be a good person. You have a tendency to be misunderstood.

I believe that you are a pure melancholic. I don't think that you are phlegmatic at all, or enough to call yourself phelgmatic. While you do have a tendency to shy away from conversation and confrontation in the real world, online at least you seem to be quite adamant in your opinions. You seem to be relatively quick to judge people at first, though you are not above changing your opinion after a long while and much studying. You also seem to be quite firm in what you believe in as well and often, whether intentionally or not (I can't tell), involve yourself in many arguments about your character, your beliefs, etc. The only time you seem to change your opinion is when something dramatic changes your opinion. You are not easily swayed, and tend not to be neutral on most things (unless you have never heard of them) Not necessarily a bad quality, but it is not a phelgmatic one. However, you also aren't choleric. You by no means are extroverted and lack many of the superiority and leadership qualities of cholerics. You don't constantly believe that you are right and others are wrong. You seem to be worried about what others think of you constantly.

You just seem to be firm, hateful, and quick to judge, not because you are a bad person or racist, but because of your past experiences.

I hope this has been helpful to you rather than demoralizing...

EDIT: It is funny to see people say completely agree with me when they say the opposite of what I said O_o
About the judging people. You give everyone a first chance, but you usually develop an opinion somewhat quickly (within a week if they are constantly on the site). But afterward you are relatively firm unless something drastic happens

LATER EDIT: I was unaware of the whole double temperaments thing. But if you were forced to have two temperaments then you would definitely be a Melancholic/Phlegmatic. Or maybe a Sanguine something...*laugh* right...You do have a few choleric qualities, but clearly you have more phlegmatic ones...
"So we beat on, boats against the current, ceaselessly into the past..."
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Aitor`s Avatar
16yr
United Kingdom
MelancholicSanguine
16F
1 / 2
Rating Orb Aitor, Chaotic Good Thief – joined 8 years ago 86.147.XXX.XXX8 years ago
Well I'm quite new. When I first saw the forums I said to my self "Wow, everything here is quite strict as for a forum". But after a while I have realized that this forum is the best one I saw in my life, because first of all no one insults each other (At most times), and second, everyone speaks in NORMAL English and long sentences that make sense. Thats why I think that you respect a lot of things like the English language and so on.

But most Important you are not a show off, you don't go around saying: "I make games, music and art! I have a talent and I'm better then you!", Because if I did not find out that you are the owner of this website, I would just think that your a member with 4000 Hp. So that tells me that your quite humble. Of course I agree with Jimiliscious that you prejudice the country of America (To be honest I have a similar point of view for America as you do so I prejudice people and things too).

But overall you seem to be a good person. Of course you have some minor faults like prejudice ect. but... Who does not have faults? No one is perfect and no one ever will, so there is nothing wrong with you or me or anyone else because we are all different and we are all Imperfect.
This is my signature and I love it. Let
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Eleanor Rigby`s Avatar
15yr
United States
PhlegmaticCholeric
365F
39 / 2
Rating Orb E Eleanor Rigby, Chaotic Good Scientist – joined 8 years ago 173.49.XXX.XXX8 years ago
Well, uh, you seem to hate a lot of things. However, you are NOT one of those arrogant and/or ignorant people who are binded by thier blind hatred. Take your hatred of America, for example. Yes, you hate America, but you are non-ignorant enough to have a (or several, I've noticed) valid reason, and you are non-arrogant enough to listen to the opinions of others, and have educated, eloquent debates with them, such as in the old Why Do You Love/Loathe America? thread. You are also non-arrogant enough to interact with Americans anyway, and give each a chance. The same thing can be said for many of the other things you dislike, such as Cholerics and Christians.

And, this is sort of related to the others, but you have a low self esteem, are very self-concious (just look at this thread), are pessimestic, and sometimes seem depressed (though there are other times were you seem quite happy). You're also a slef described introvert, and seem to be a little lacking in social skills.

However, on the bright side, you seem slow to judge, and don't rashly jump into decisions. Once you carefaully consider your decision, you are firm in it, and you seem to be spirited in your beliefs. You often have a well-thought out, educated position on issues and debates. you can be funny, at least from what I've seen in the chat and comments, and you don't take yourself so seriously that you can't make fun of yourself every now and then (I remember a set of comments on one of the polls between you and CtG, calling "that Pseudolonewolf fellow" an arrogant troll and the like).

From what I've seen (or is read more appropriate, since we're on the internet?) you are a pretty good guy, you are just, as Jimilicious said, misunderstood.
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Death Knight`s Avatar
15yr
United States
SanguineCholeric
26F
26 / 9
Rating Orb Death Knight, Neutral Good Dark Knight – joined 9 years ago 68.100.XXX.XXX8 years ago
I realize , as I write this post, that I am being a hypocrite as many of your faults are also shared by myself. I don't think that you are a racist, because being racist implies having hatred against a specific race, or culture. I do think that you are unfairly prejudiced against the United States. I think England is still bitter at America, because America beat them in the Revolutionary War, consequetually ending the British Empire. What many of the British fail to realize is that England was the America of the 19th and 20th century. I am straying off topic.Anyways it is hurtful to hear you hear you rant about what a crap country America is, when half of the people on your site are from America, and I think that most of the Americans who do agree with you, are sort of intimidated by you, and think that you won't like them as much, because they actually do like America. It is also annoying to hear you criticize America's name, calling it Usaian or whatever, because it shares its name with a continent, but you don't do that same with Australia.

I think that you are a very fair person and that is one of your best qualities. I do think that you intimidate you, and that people blindly agree with you because they want to stay in your favor. You seem to make people feel 'dumb' and act like they are idiots when they don't understand something or don't see the slightest change. One example of this is when you made a few changes to the site, and one of the members didn't notice them, you said something similar(Again similar) to "ARE YOU BLIND?!?!?!". I have noticed you do that kind of thing a lot.

As negative as this post may sound, I do like you, I think that you are funny, interesting and extremely intelligent. And you are a 'good person' even though you are sometimes too quick to judge a person.

Umm I am going to end with one last thought that might earn me a few stupidity violations and some devaluations, but I think that you are Melancholic/Choleric, not a Melancholic/Phlegmatic. You don't seem to have any Phlegmatic traits at all, but you seem to have quite a few choleric traits. I have never seen you 'lose' and argument about anything to anyone, even if the majority of the members are supporting the other person. You also seem like more Melancholic/Choleric members(Rythalion) than Melancholic/Phlegmatic members (Matrigan). Of course I am not very good at identifying temperaments, and you have studied for years about them....

And just so everyone knows this post is not meant to offend Pseudo, it is just meant for constructive criticism, so if anyone has objections to anything in this post, PM me and I will edit this post later.Thanks.
-Death Knight
Edit: Ok, I thought that the USAian thing was one of those little things that you used to used to harp on the USA, sorry. Americansisms, that is another term that annoys me, what exactly does it mean?And I believe that the English media, which obviously influences you, is, like most of England, angry at America and quick it criticize it. If America is so bad then why do millions of people try to immigrate into America, myself included.....
Australia consists of Australia and New Zealand, and little islands....
<br />
"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?<br />
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Pseudolonewolf`s Avatar
23yr
United Kingdom
MelancholicPhlegmatic
559F
293 / 8
Rating Orb A β Pseudolonewolf, Neutral Good Almighty God-King – joined 10 years ago ..XXX.XXX8 years ago
About the temperaments thing, I have studied them for ages now and, as I said, I do a lot of introspection... So I know exactly how I am, and I know that melancholic/phlegmatic fits (there are no 'pure', single temperament people) and that melancholic/choleric really doesn't. I tend to have such distaste for cholerics because of the phlegmatic traits that I do have; they do things I never would and I hate it... Confrontational or forceful things. Hmm.

Anyway, I think that people probably have, uh, caricatured ideas of the temperaments a lot of the time and think that phlegmatics should be something like completely and utterly meek and submissive to everyone or something? So when someone argues at all, ever, then they CAN'T be even partly phlegmatic, right?
The traits I have from my phlegmatic temperament mainly show themselves as extreme nervousness and anxiety about, well, everything... I have no confidence, which cholerics basically OOZE. Melancholic/cholerics have that 'calm, cool' way of talking, whereas I, uh, am more unsure of myself (using things like 'probably' and 'maybe' and ellipses and 'uh' a lot)...
Of course, due to being primarily melancholic, I do obviously argue and try to make things a certain way, but this, as I've explained on my profile, I think, is for different reasons to if I was choleric. If I was choleric, I'd argue to show that I WAS RIGHT, and stuff, but I mainly argue because I am *distressed* by things Not Being Right...
Like with creationists, for example... I hate that they wear ignorance like a badge of honour and try to basically draw people away from the science that forms the foundation of our society... It just ISN'T RIGHT, and that's why I argue so passionately. I form my opinions on what seems like the best thing for the world much of the time, rather than my own personal preferences. (This is the root of most of my opinions... Not all, since some are just personal distaste, but most...)
Anyway, uh, I could go on about that for a while, but I find melancholic/cholerics intimidating and off-putting because of how unlike me they are (or rather, they 'come close' due to the melancholic bit but then in their secondary temperament they're very different...)
I could go about this for ages, but I'll leave it at this for now... I'll probably try to explain further if, uh, people STILL think I'm wrong about reading myself using a system I'm intimately familiar with... o_O
(If I WAS choleric, I doubt I'd hate them...)

Something else, also: I act very differently since I am the administrator of this site, which I built myself... If I was a mere member, I'd, uh, assert myself and argue FAR less often; in fact, I don't join other forums because I just assume that either I'd not fit in, not be wanted, wouldn't have anything to say, or wouldn't want to inflict myself on others...
It seems also that people often do not realise that the melancholic and choleric temperaments are very similar; it's just that one is the extroverted version, the other the introverted version. I refer to them as the 'hard' temperaments on the Temperaments page, opposed to the 'soft' phlegmatic and sanguine... Both are stubborn and selfish and they argue and like being right, but the reasons are different as is how they go about it...

Anyway, I was basically just asking how people perceive me though, rather than asking people to tell me how I am... I know how I am and understand myself, so, uh, yes. Opinions... Though I feel I have to explain myself when peoples' opinions are not 'correct'.

Oh, also, I only argue about things that I feel I have solid knowledge about, and if I don't think my opinion is right, then I don't argue; this is why it might seem like I always feel I'm right and 'don't listen to other peoples' views'.
If my opinion IS right - and usually 'my opinion' means the 'side' of the matter that seems to be the most solid and rational (atheism and evolution for example rather than the alternatives) - then should I just, for no good reason, admit that the other person is right just for the sake of submitting? It seems that sometimes people just feel that I SHOULD just 'give in' just for the sake of it, even if I strongly know based on evidence, etc, that the other person's argument isn't, uh, correct.
If they were very convincing, then I'd convert to 'their side' and argue from THAT perspective just as passionately... maybe.

My distaste for the USA has nothing to do with any *wars* (why on Earth would you assume that 'we' are sore about some ancestors beating some other ancestors at combat or something?); I don't even know anything about that war you mentioned...
The place annoys me because of the attitudes that it gives off as a nation to the rest of the world, of ignorance and arrogance. Many, many non-Americans will tell you that the USA seems to think that it's the best place on Earth, it invented freedom, they're always the good guys, etc, and it's all very irritating...
Their media also overwhelms the media in other countries, such as this one that I'm in. I hate how the speech of young English-speakers the world over is full of Americanisms... It feels like soon, other countries will just be assimilated or something.

Also, I didn't start the 'USAian' thing; I did that because WillAlvein, who's from Chile - on the AMERICAN CONTINENT but not the USA - said that it was annoying how USAians felt that they were the only ones who were Americans or something, whereas the rest of the people on the American continent are called... what?
Australia is a country and a continent, but there are not MULTIPLE countries on the Australian continent whose inhabitants could all be called 'Australians'... So 'Australian' always refers to someone from the Australian continent and country.

Anyway, uh... yes. Our pasts shape us, and mine wasn't exactly sparklingly happy by any means... So my temperaments, together with bad experience, make me very bitter...

Uh, I don't think I have any specific other things to reply to, but I am very interested in hearing things and appreciative of peoples' posts here!
I am the made this site hello hello.
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Wiz Zumwalt`s Avatar
32yr
Hungary
SanguineMelancholic
40F
14 / 2
Rating Orb Wiz Zumwalt, Neutral Good Healer – joined 8 years ago 2.26.XXX.XXX8 years ago
Death Knight, if anything deserves a Stupidity in your post, it is missing the fact that there are multiple countries in America, but not in Australia. :) Certainly not your point about temperaments - actually, I was just about to say something similar!
Pseudo, what can be seen on this site suggests that you are very melancholic - about 80-90% -, and the "rest of you" is predominantly choleric; you don't exhibit any phlegmatic traits. I'm absolutely willing to believe that you are in fact melancholic/phlegmatic, I'm just saying you don't come through as such.

Otherwise, Eleanor's paragraphs 2 and 3 say exactly what I think - I won't even bother paraphrasing them they're so much on the nail. I'd guess that the discrepancy between what you think you are like vs. what people here (or even elsewhere?) observe is mainly due to your exceptionally low self-esteem (which is also the main reason behind some problems you yourself complain about or are bothered by at times; indirectly, it is also a major reason behind any work / money problems).

You're a good guy but you seem to be unable to believe that, obviously due to your past and possibly your present too...
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Chocobo_Fan`s Avatar
14yr
United States
MelancholicPhlegmatic
539F
75 / 4
Rating Orb Chocobo_Fan, Neutral Good Healer – joined 10 years ago 209.150.XXX.XXX8 years ago
What I'm going to say is probably going to sound uneducated and ignorant and simply wrong. But, this seems to be something that Pseudolonewolf is asking the forum as a whole, so I feel like I should reply just on principle...

You're definitely very Melancholic, Pseudo. I've read a lot of your posts and I feel like you're similar to me in a lot of ways -- only more Melancholic and bitter. Maybe. I think that the main reason I enjoy visiting this site so much is that here in the US there are so few Melancholics -- or if there are, they're forced to wear Sanguine or Choleric "masks". This makes me feel detached from the world as a whole, as there are so few people who I can relate to. But I can relate to you and many of the others on this site, which is what makes it so important to me.

You're a good person, Pseudo. Sometimes I feel you're very wise, though that's probably just because you're older than me. Since your secondary temperament is something that people enjoy discussing in this thread, I'll comment on it, too: You don't seem very Choleric to me. Your secondary temperament is definitely Phlegmatic. Since this is your site, you do act a bit more active and assertive than you would normally, I'm sure -- this is your place, after all. However, I believe the reason some people think you're Choleric isn't just because of that -- I think it's because your tertiary temperament is Choleric.

Yes, yes, I know you hate my theory that people have more than two temperaments each and I'm probably horribly wrong, but hear me out.

When you first told me (and a few other people who were in the chatroom at the time) that "everyone has a primary and secondary temperament", I thought that that was wrong at first. Now I realize it's correct. But the reason it is correct is, in my opinion, because everyone's personality is made up of a combination of all four temperaments. Everyone has a bit of Choleric-ness in them, just as everyone has a bit of Phlegmatic-ness in them. But it's the varying degrees of how much of each temperament one person has that determines their full personality. (sort of) You can't just take two temperaments and ignore the others -- you yourself have said that there's a difference between, say, Melancholic/Phlegmatics and Phlegmatic/Melancholics. That's because, while Melancholic and Phlegmatic are their most dominant temperaments, they have them in varying degrees. The Phlegmatic/Melancholic is more Phlegmatic than Melancholic, the Melancholic/Phlegmatic vice versa. But what about Sanguine and Choleric in those two examples? Those people, too, have Sanguine and Choleric to varying degrees. Two people could both be Choleric/Sanguine, but still, they act significantly differently from each other -- not just the slightness from every human personality being unique. That is because one is Choleric/Sanguine/Melanchlolic and one is Choleric/Sanguine/Phlegmatic. Or at least, that's my belief. My firm belief is that you are a Melancholic/Phlegmatic/Choleric.

Of course, I don't understand the temperaments nearly as well as you do, so I'm probably horribly, horribly wrong. My apologies in that case. My beliefs may change with time; feel free to correct me if you wish.

But enough of that. This is about you, not the temperaments.

(Another topic is about your hatred about the US, but people have discussed that to death already so I won't bother)

Some of the things we see about you are, of course, seen through a filter or sorts, as you are the leader of this site and its sole administrator. But of course, you're not some perfect god-king. No one is, of course. I do not hate you, but I do respect you. You're a wise and reasonable person. We don't have enough of those people in the world.

Many people accuse me of being a "suck-up" to you, so I suppose I won't just say the positive things about you. You have faults, of course -- so does everyone. You have low self-esteem, you're misunderstood, and in general you seem to exhibit many of the negative traits of Melancholics.

Dear me, I seem to have gone on for quite a while. I'm not good at writing things, and things like this are no exception, so my wording is probably off a bit. Or something. I suppose I'll end this here.

(I bet I'm going to look back on this in a year or two and be embarrassed by how poorly written and stupid this is. Oh well...)
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SunChilde`s Avatar
23yr
South Africa
CholericPhlegmatic
29F
8 / 0
Rating Orb SunChilde, Chaotic Neutral Mediator – joined 8 years ago 198.54.XXX.XXX8 years ago
I've only been on this forum for a short while, but people seem to be very polarized about their opinions on you Mr.Pseudolonewolf. I apologize, but I cannot fall into this category. I think my like/dislike opinion of you is still lurking on the sidelines, waiting, biding it's time to jump into my amygdala.

Let me add, I (like you I think) am a super-critical person. I am this way about myself, about the world, and about others. I am this way, because I see no better way to move forward in the world than by fixing that which is wrong with it. You have to notice stuff to fix it. I share this information because I value honesty in communication. Forthright is a word I hope to have engraved on my skull when I die.
That having been said, I like this site, and I am saying all these things because you asked. I hope they are taken as the attempted objective observations and interpretations that they are. I can give you hugs after if it so pleases you.
Regardless, let's try to this succinctly, then wax verbose afterward.

Easy ones: Good person vs. bad person . . . well I think anyone who bases that on their knowledge of you from a website is probably going to be a bit shaky on accuracy, but you don't seem to have ill intentions. So I think that places you on the side of good, along with the fact that you care about what people think/feel. Things like getting angry because people stubbornly believe in creationism, for example, can only come from the fact that you care about people in general. Them believing in creationism is unlikely to really bother you, and when it does, it's on a case to case basis. It makes you angry ALL the time, because you feels it damages society/humanity/culture/etc.
Do you intimidate people? Yes. You intimidated me the first time you addressed me directly. I would be surprised if you even remember, mostly because I don't think that was your intention. I doubt it ever is. But the answer, in the end, is still yes. I think this happens because you seem to have an attitude towards ignorance similar to the attitude you have towards most things: Hate.

Mmkay, succinct seems to have failed, so I'm just gonna go full force.

I think this is the main problem with your interactions with folk on this website. The problem is, most people are heavily emotionally invested in their thoughts, beliefs, and in their fragile ego or self-concept. When someone tells them that they are stupid or ignorant, that sucks. But it sucks just as much when you explain exactly why you hate something that they care about. It hurts their little self-concept, because the big intellectual bad-boy web designing mastermind behind Fighunter.com has a worse opinion of them. And if they are here, that means they probably care. People are either here because they like your forum, or they like your games, most of them for both of those reasons. If you produce something as cool as those games, or this forum, you must be a God-King of some sort right? So your opinion matters to them.
And yes, you are obviously a very creative, well researched and intelligent guy. So when you express your opinions in a place where people care about them, if they are negative, which they are more frequently than not, people make sad faces.

Moving right along.

Dishonest to avoid being banned? If I thought you would ban me for trying to slowly and logically report my ideas, I wouldn't be here in the first place. So no.

Now onto the personal feeling stuff. I can see how lots of people would get you mixed up with a choleric in this forum, but yeah, reasons as opposed to actions. You don't think like a choleric, even when you act as a choleric may act.
I found you quite jarring when I first came to the site. I got to see the side of you which was depressive and angry. Later, as I perused the forums, I encountered the logical, thought out, researched, intellectual side of you. The side that tries it's darndest to get your ideas across to the other individual, and to whom clear communication is key. It helped me understand the abrasiveness I initially experienced quite a bit. I could relate, as many people find me abrasive because of my candor.

Now as a very personal observation, that I put forward simply to mull over in the air. Actually, perhaps better proposed in a question. Why do you hate all these things you hate? The problem I shall put forward, is you talk a fair amount of rationality, impartiality, clear thinking and so on. Well then I'd assume you would have come across the idea that all emotional reactions are relative. I can see a bunny and feel happy, someone else gets hungry, little Albert runs in Terror (sorry for those who don't get the reference, just wikipedia it). Knowing that emotions are personalized, you can't really argue for them in any objective fashion. You can say a hundred things you hate about something, but you'd have to explain why each of those things elicited hate, and the chain would continue ad infinitum.
Now that's not to say you can just turn that switch off. We can't just decide to feel happy (generally). But we can start trends in our emotional make up. The problem is, with your desire to explain yourself so clearly, you generate more and more reasons to hate the things you do, deepening your hatred for them in the process. Once you have a thousand reasons to hate something, you are going to have to generate 1001 reasons to like it to come out relatively neutral.
So really, barring having great justification when you say you hate something, what's the point? Hatred isn't really fun, enjoyable, productive. There are very few situations where hatred is any use at all.

Gah. I've probably overstepped my bounds, and I apologize. But I am a psychologist by profession, and a humanist by nature. I say these things because it saddens my heart that an individual as obviously creative and intelligent as yourself may lose so much of their cognitive and emotional energy on something like hating. Maybe I'm wrong and you honestly enjoy it . . . but regardless, that's my two cents, and I say it cause I care.

Overall, I think you are a good guy. You care a lot. You try to make things better. You go about it in a slightly odd way some of the time, and people get on your ass about it. That sucks. But meh, you should have my fandom until you become a nazi. (this is where I'd put the smiley, but that would probably be the straw that broke the back of this camel of a post.)

Ciao!

Intoxicatingly Incoherent.
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DeNovo`s Avatar
24yr
United States
MelancholicSanguine
201F
61 / 4
Rating Orb E β DeNovo, Lawful Neutral Programmer – joined 8 years ago ..XXX.XXX8 years ago
My opinion of you has not changed since our first exchange. (Oh no it's that "calm, cool, choleric" way of talking!!11--I'll touch on that later) As I am not similar to you, I cannot empathize with your position, and only offer what I can observe as an outsider who has never even met you in person.

I'll start off with what I know about you that I view in a positive light. You are considerate, persevering, and listen to the words of others. You work hard, have recognizable talent, and desire pleasant social interaction over conflict. You enjoy humor, value and recognize the input of others, and write coherently, if not cogently.

Um... I don't know you well enough to know what else about you there is to like... Maybe Firequill would have things I could agree with...?

And now for the other half.

You say that you're open-minded, and deliberate extensively about all things before coming to decisions. You tell us that your nature of not wanting to inconvenience others, as shown by your phlegmatic traits, and great fear of expectations is what makes you the way you are. You believe that you're "different," not better than everyone else, and feel negatively mostly toward "choleric temperaments."

I'm not in any way claiming that what I say is true, by the way. This is a disclaimer for everything that follows.

I don't believe you. I feel like being "phlegmatic" is this big shield you draw over yourself, and other people being "choleric" is this self-defense mechanism you invoke whenever you feel like you're being put in an uncomfortable position. You view goodwill and arrogance as two sides of the same coin, and thus the world is only more arrogant when someone hopes that you might be less miserable. You wallow in your misery and pretend that being miserable is an inextricable aspect of your existence. You attack what you don't understand by denying its relevance, and "hate" things you aren't willing to come to terms with. You wield your "being different" like it's some sort of all-powerful trump card. By "being different, not better," you shirk the responsibilities that are shouldered (possibly willingly, but maybe not always) by the majority of mentally sound human beings. Instead of self-improvement, or "growing up," you're "different" and there's no way that would ever work out for you. Whenever someone is naive enough to offer advice, you escape behind your walls and defenses and dismiss everything in hopes that they'll give up.

In conclusion, your behavior makes you looked frightened into arrogance; you give up before you've even tried, and to cover this up you put on an act of cool-headed analysis and wisdom, as if you knew it would fail and thus instead of bothering to try you'd rather never succeed and maintain whatever situation you're in. You dislike interacting with people and being subject to other's expectations because instead of coming to terms with failure you shy away from a chance at success. I have never met a human being (and I've seen a lot of weirder people than you) who has actually been unable to get over the emotional stresses associated with what you're avoiding. If being melancholic/phlegmatic is really what you make it out to be, then people of your temperament aren't simply psychologically characterized, you may suffer from biological issues as well. I have a great deal of trouble agreeing with your idea that you are who you are, and not only do you not want to, but are unable to change. I'm not talking about temperaments in this case; "normal" people change frequently and regularly with the course of time, and this "difference" you claim sets you apart is something I don't understand.

Of course, I know that my words won't get through to you on this, because if I'm right this is a vicious cycle and if you're right then there's no helping your situation anyway. I don't pretend to know who and what you are, or to have the magic pill that will bring an end to all those things that make you displeased with the way the world is. That's up to you. But I do believe that, if you really wanted to, all the things you didn't like about yourself could be solved, or converted into something you viewed positively. Weakness isn't a virtue in my eyes, and it seems to explain everything you do.

This has worked for you, and I don't know anywhere near enough about you to be able to give any credit to possible explanations I see for your behavior. So this isn't an attempt to "prove I'm right" or "establish my superiority." This is my honest (unsweetened) opinion of who you are as I know you now. I have a low opinion of myself--and you seem to have failed to overcome some of the things I dealt with years ago.


Uhh... that's where the angry/condescending tone ends! I'm really bad at talking about other people in a less than know-it-all way, so I'm sorry if this makes you feel all terrible and stuff...again. D:

Ephemeral dreams and perpetual ire; melodious lies from Eternity
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