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Forum: Short stories
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5 years ago
It's not really hard to read, it just needs the right audience. Your mom for example, well I don't know her of course, but probably she likes to read other stuff than you. So it's understandable that she doesn't quite know what to do with the story. But I, and a lot of other people probably, like that kind of style. Maybe try to show it other people of whom you know they read much and ideally a lot of different stuff.
I don't think that it's good when you try to force a writing style on you that does not come naturally to you. I guess you have to know if you deem it possible for you; I for example liked your last stories alot too, if that was a different style for you even, but it seems different to me. It depends on which target group you would like to have, but as I said just your mom and some people on the internet are maybe not sufficient enough to judge.
Sorry that my only idea basically is to ask other people and then decide for yourself. But I know literature only from the viewpoint of a reader.